No awkward props or Cirque du Soleil-style contortions—just pleasure
When it comes to sex, there is such a thing as feeling too comfortable.
“Shaking things up a bit can add excitement and spontaneity,” says Ellen Barnard, a sex educator and owner of A Woman’s Touch, a Madison, Wisconsin–based sexuality and education center.
The key words there: “a bit.” Experts agree that you don’t need to try (or buy) anything extreme to achieve a big boost in novelty and pleasure. Test one or more of these moves out tonight and see for yourself.
Engage in afterplay
Done with the main event? Now’s the perfect time to return to some foreplay favorites, says sex educator Emily Nagoski.
When your partner is already aroused, she may find that certain moves feel extra-intense, Nagoski explains.
Not only that, but if you’ve always been curious about trying something new, like, say a type of toy, after intercourse can be a great time to engage because you both may be less inhibited. Plus, there’s no pressure on the trick to actually work. You’re just having fun for fun’s sake
Open the windows—but close the curtains
The feeling of the breeze on your bare skin and the ever-so-slight possibility that the neighbors might hear your moans can be incredibly arousing, says Harlan Cohen, author of Getting Naked.
Or, if you’re feeling even more daring, instigate a makeout session in your backyard as it gets dark. Even though it’s remote, the fear you could get caught produces an adrenaline rush that adds a layer of excitement and urgency to the encounter.
Scratch her head
The scalp contains tons of nerve endings—that’s why that mini-scalp massage when you get your hair cut always feels so good.
Even though the touch is G-rated, the skin-on-skin contact can trigger a flow of bonding hormones like oxytocin that can make you both feel more connected, explains Ian Kerner, author of She Comes First.
And because the act isn’t automatically linked to sex, it can pave the way for a long evening of back-and-forth foreplay before the main event, which often gets lost in long-term relationships.
Corrupt the couch
Start with making out high-school style and then amp up the action by having her straddle your knee. Here, you can rock back and forth while you’re kissing, which provides direct stimulation to her clitoris, says Emily Morse, a sex expert and host of the podcast Sex With Emily.
Raid the freezer
Experts agree that plain old ice cubes can make any encounter extremely hot. Not only does the chill of the ice stimulate the same part of the nervous system that’s responsible for arousal, but the sensation jolts your brain away from work and into the here-and-now.
Try running one along her hips and up her thighs, or ask her to do the same to you, suggests Barnard. (Eat your way to better sex with these foods.)